The Lost Disciple

O Master, I can not adventure with thee; At the Door of the Dawn, in my lone wandering, I have broken my staff; for the true dawn is she Who comes every day with her jar to the spring. Ay, Master, I tarried last night at the gate Of her garden, which kisses the Lake Galilee; She was gathering flowers and fruits for the Fete, And with tulips and poppies she beckoned to me. In her lamp there was oil, in my hand there was fire; In her house cried a voice, ‘O make haste with the flame!’ On my lips were the names of the daughters of Tyre, On her breast were the lilies that whispered thy name. I have dared, O my Master, to envy thy feet, And to yearn for the love of a Magdalen fair; I have dreamed that mine, too, in the heart of the street, Were laved with her own hands and dried with her hair. O Master, my lips her devotion have stained, For her soul’s precious ointments were offered late; I have lost in the fire of my lust what I gained In my longing and love for her love and thy fate.