A Girl Named Fred

Once upon a time not many years ago a girl named Fred fell in love with a boy named Fran. Although the names seemed an odd combination and could easily be confused by people who did not know that Fred was a girl and Fran was a boy. They made the perfect couple as everyone agreed and when their wedding day arrived, the priest who was standing in did not know about the names only that he was marrying a Fred to a Fran. Turning to Fran he said, Fred with you take this woman to be your lawful wedded wife. Excuse me Father, but I think that should be husband. The priest looked up a bit dismayed, but just carried on. Turning to Fred said Fran will you take this man to be your lawful wedded husband. Excuse me Father, but I think that should wife. The priest’ eyes rolled around in his head very dazed and confused. The silent sniggers in the congregation began to grow louder as peels of laughter not bells rang out within the church. The poor priest was now in utter disarray and after blessing the rings; he handed them back the wrong way about. Then the poor priest red faced said to whomever I pronounce you man and wife. Just to make things more riotous someone switched the Wedding March to Rock Around The Clock, which sent the bride and groom bopping down the isle, and the poor priest he had a nervous breakdown saying he would never perform a wedding ceremony again. He would stick to funerals as there was only one body involved and they wouldn’t talk back to him.