Early Works - Is It The Love In Me

Sadness is showing in my eyes deep within the softness of the night. Is it love I feel or an illusion of something that could never be real? My heart is bouncing like a spring as echoing in my ears are bells chiming in concession with each other, but how can this be love should never come to me. The confessions of my mind delude my sense of reason that it has built a myth within heart, a falsity of fragments t hat falsify the true facts of love and life. Knowing love is a once in a lifetime thing I know only sadness, it will never come to me. My life is lost in the boundaries where romantics lie in the solitude of tranquillity where only the sounds of passion herald near the wayward tombs of love and only the sounds of sleeping elude the silence of the night. Encrusted in a velvet sky are diamond shaped gleams of stars in the heavens and a gold crusted ball of light - the moon, which is said to be a lovers light of peace and tranquillity, but like all symbolic features of love it has a falsity to fact, for lovers need no moon to love and much prefer when it is lacked. Though all these falsities are based on things of my past. Could love be real? Can it really last? Or is my imagination taking over my heart, my mind, my body, my soul, and my life or is it love that has me in its grasp. My mind tells me to deny the fact, my heart wants me to believe it, and so in my conquest of heart and mind I believe my heart and fall for you. Its all right for me, but you - you are afraid that I will hurt you. In this confession, my heart and my mind give a promise. Never to break your heart for I find you are the only one I love. These words are from the heart, not from the mind and tell of the true deep feeling. Although I fell I cannot tell you, my feeling do not count and once again like every time before the priceless thing in life I must forfeit as it seems my destiny is to live without love. 13 August 1968