T.V Repair Man

He proudly sports an 80's permed mullet And a tacky ear ring; slightly eccentric With bits of stubble on his double chin. He drives a rusted white van; now looks grey. He is known to exceed the speed limit In built up areas & town centres. He greedily gobbles greasy fish & chips On weekdays; out of newspaper wrappers. He watches Sky Sports; reads the Daily Star. He has recently quit smoking but still Likes the lagers while he's out on the lash. He's quite stocky and 5ft six; although he Has a stomach that bulges through his T Shirt. He's an ardent fan of the Toon army And likes a Kitkat with a cup of tea. He's divorced but would like a brand new wife; Likes AC/DC & Guns N' Roses; Plays air guitar at the club on Sundays He takes his time on jobs for what it's worth. And makes damn sure that he charges the earth!