The Sensible Romance Of Mildred

MILDRED McGee was a beautiful blond, As fair as peroxide could make her. She was never so shy that a man going by Would imagine that she was a Quaker. She had suitors that called every night in the week And one of them worked in a shoe shop, But her 'favor-ite' man was a chap named McGann Who was boss of a gang in a glue shop. Her folks used to scoff at young Patrick McGann For they wished her to marry a plumber; But Mildred was true to the maker of glue, Though she flirted at times with a drummer. Though she flirted at times with the pharmacist's clerk, And she flirted at times with the baker, She stuck to McGann, the glue factory man. Not a bit could her fond parents shake her. 'You're in awful bad odor,' she said, 'with my folks, When you come they both turn up their noses; But I said when they kicked, that the plumber they've picked Isn't scented with attar of roses. When a girl is in love with a fellow, I've found There's something inside her that rages; An' I'd rather be true to a sweetheart like you Than a sweet-smelling chap with no wages. 'There's many fine fellows who brag of their jobs An' spend all their coin in a brew shop; An' take it from me, I'd much rather be The wife of the man in a glue shop. Not all of us girls can get married to dudes An' college professors an' scholars; With you I'm content, I'll not stop at a scent So long as you bring in the dollars.'