Dousing The Light

I knew of course, one starts this bitter journey at the very top. Each step gives you a little jolt as if to jog the memories now gone, the sound is barely there and I control it as I have to hear those voices of my little gnomes who will, of that I'm sure, jump off my skin just like the rats they are and watch the ship go down without a shred of glory, see the captain drown. Not many left, I see, the bottom is in sight, a clumsy stumble but no fall, I am the clown, yes I am ready will you kindly douse the light.