The German Pope Likes Sauerkraut

The Pope, at his inauguration was speaking to the silent nation. Surrounded by twelve microphones which would record all local tones. There is a problem when at mass a Pope is harbouring some gas. Well, this one was expecting trouble from what began as a small bubble. He was a German Pope, of course and had been, in his school, a force. Had studied modern electronics and knew a bit about the sonics. The volume knob was next to bass, (he'd squeezed his cheeks to close his ass) , he cranked the loudness to the MAX which made his gluteals relax. The thunderbolt was heard for miles, small flames had hurried past his piles, in desperation he exclaimed 'you people ought to be ashamed, you heard His anger of expression, He knows you lied in your confession.' And when the service came to end the people went around the bend and stood with melancholy grins before the box to shed their sins. There still was left inside the Pope some gas with which he had to cope. The oldest woman went inside and told the Pope she was a bride and to be married very soon out at the zoo, to a baboon. As you might guess, the woman had over the century gone mad. The Pope had never met her though and laughed just like a giggolo. Not realising that relaxing can be, on anal sphincters, taxing. And out it flew, a big misfire that shook the pulpit and the spire. The woman now remarked 'Force Ten', 'We've made Him really mad again.'