Jaded

Jaded... By fading consequences Held onto like treasured jewels. But I do not sparkle within, Or radiate a gladness Shown on the surface... And polished with pretense! Jaded... A product of delusion Manifested by observation And a fixed comfort zone. Transfixed and smothering! I run to escape... But no one chases! I hide to shelter myself, From myself! I'm jaded! Corralled and fenced in Behind gates I alone can unlock! I have the keys in my pocket. If I should open them... Someone else may find my space, And free it of complaint! And that is my biggest fear. I'm jaded. With a need to hold onto something real! Exhausted and left unchallenged.