Depression

sitting at home in deep thought medical help I had sought. a case of depression is what they said so i went home and went to bed. I refused to believe that's what it could be but denial is always first, as was told to me. how is that possible? how can it be? I've always been happy and carefree. he had said: i keep my anger bottled up inside it is something that I learned to hide. no two cases are ever the same and there's no reason to feel ashamed. depression is a state of mind which affects your body all the time. it will make me sluggish and tired and wanting to hide. I won't want to talk to anyone. that is when depression has begun. i may sit in a corner all by myself wondering if I'm living in hell. I feel as if life has turned its back on me. but in my heart that's not what I see. i start to ignore the way I look and the toll that it took. then I take a good look in the mirror 'and what do I see' everything that was told to me. I see my face completely withdrawn and the appearance that I formed. I see all the loved ones that I've hurt including the wife that's giving birth. I realize then that I can not do it alone. that I must seek the help that i need to stop this inner bleed. i fell down to my knees and asked the LORD to hear my pleas to give me the strength to do my best and for him to do the rest. as I got up from my short prayer i heard a voice say in my ear. 'help yourself and i will help you That's all you have to do. (C) L. RAMS