Something Unbeautiful

There is somewhere I always wind up going Where logic has no foothold And reason does not function For all the words want to spell themselves backwards There emotions take me hostage And confusion reigns over feelings I never know I am going there at all Until it's too late and then I'm stuck I'm flailing in quicksand Quick; somebody come save me I'm going down deeper into despair But there is no savior in the world Now I'm not even me anymore All the constants are gone Except fear and loathing I would kill this jailer if I could once see his face- Then something unbeautiful comes, which does not love me.