The Santa Incident

It was just before dawn when St. Nick did arrive as he stifled a yawn took a swig to revive put the bottle away and with head over heels crashing down, come what may (you don't know how it feels) . As he landed below in the ashes and fire he shook off the fresh snow and brushed off his attire. He discovered a snag in the pants near the crotch quick he stuffed in a rag and then had some more Scotch. Now awakened from snores she came down to the hall as cold drafts hurt her pores she then saw that a tall rather round bearded man stood in front of the tree so she called out to Stan bring the rifle to me there's a man in the house and she grabbed the umbrella heard the steps of her spouse started hitting the fella who defended himself and called up to the sky for some help from an elf but when Stan heard the cry he did lunge in the den at that moment they'd tripped and she clucked like a hen now her nightie was ripped and his pants had torn more he was pinning her now to the carpeted floor. Now, the size of a cow is compared to old Stan rather small and he worked as a Klabauterman. Thus he twisted and jerked 'til old Nick had enough he had beaten the crap out of Nick's inner stuff. So St. Nick took a nap until Easter and past in the end he went back and they all were aghast. So today, with his sack he goes round and around, you can always be sure he can never be found in a house on his tour and he wears Levis jeans to protect against snags it is also a means to discourage the fags. So, the fakes at the Malls that will sit with the kids are St. Nicks without balls they belong in the Ritz. And the real McCoy far beyond recognition brings so many a toy in the ancient tradition. In the house of Big Stan he still snores like a boar since St. Nick is no fan he will go there no more.