Seeking Enlightenment

We're walking together, there's a mention of weather, But the subject quickly changes to 'Why'; And while we are walking, I'm doing all the talking, Desperately trying to coax a reply Why do you allow killing, and Why are you willing To see your children in despair? Why are we so greedy, ignoring the needy, But the 'Whys' dissipate into air I arrive at the altar, and it's here that I falter, What words do I use to implore? I hesitate and fumble, I stutter, then mumble, Why won't He open the door? And there was no meeting, not even a greeting, Again, to defeat I succumb; No matter my craving, my soul's not worth saving, The enlightenment just doesn't come! Then I go to the seashore, looking for recourse, Could the sand be holding a clue? And it runs through my fingers, (the memory still lingers) , But I can't say I learned something new I head for the mountain to drink from the Fountain, Trying to figure out who I am; But I leave with my sorrow - I may return tomorrow, But today, I just don't give a damn! Many times I've said it and I'll probably regret it, Some night when the guilt's running high; And once again we'll go walking, but I won't be talking, I just do what I must to get by But what can I say now, I'm walking away now, The river has started to freeze; I head back to my cave, which becomes my grave, And my solitude turns into peace