Drunken Life

Drunken Life I wake up on a Sunday Morning To the sound of cars horning Smelling of booze And a particular ooze No wash, no breakfast, no amount of food Can put me in my desired frame of mood All dressed From yesterdays mess I am ready to visit my favourite spot This is where I once fought A pub with loads of alcohol Where I can stand up all mighty and tall Six pints of lager And I stagger But hold on it is not yet over For I am in Dover in my Rover Prepared for a sleepover from any type of hangover I am now boarding a ferry As I am high and merry To Calais a land of gold For the old and bold so I am told I am hoping to smuggle without a fine 6 cartons of cigarettes and 6 cartons of wine This is the life of a sadistic drunk It’s quite a contrast from that of a monk 6 shots of spirits And I am ready to vomit So I sit while I take out my kit A special small emergency bucket So I can pour out my juices like a rocket People in the city Look at me and feel pity As I beg for change What a shame at my age I still want more For this body is hardcore This is the life of a sadistic drunk It’s quite a contrast from that of a monk With a bottle of beer in one hand I wave it around like a magic wand My head is spinning I am no longer winning I slumber to the street My body has given up in defeat This is the life of a sadistic drunk It’s quite a contrast from that of a monk I find myself waking up in a cell Just as I dreamt that I fell It is cold and freezing as hell From my face you can easily tell A policeman says to me By the way I forgot to mention Six more cautions And you will spend the entire winter season In one of the worst prisons Please I say, I will not do it again I may be stupid but I am definitely not insane I am immediately released As if infectiously diseased Outside I think of some gin and tonic And start to begin to feel quite erotic Stop I say for today I need to take a break For my life is at stake This is the life of a sadistic drunk It’s quite a contrast from that of a monk © Sylvia Chidi- 17 October 2005