Once My Silence Held You Spellbound

You wouldn't discuss me because my suffering was not theoretical enough. Enough. Enough. Enough. Now I am theoretical enough. I am theatrical enough. I have learnt all these big big words. I can use them with abandon. I can misuse them. I can refuse them. I can throw them about and one day, I can throw them out. I am the renegade who can drop these multi-syllable monsters for studied, stylistic effect. I am the rebel who can drop them altogether. I invent new ones every passing day. FYI, OED consults me. Roget's Thesaurus finds it tough to stay updated. But because I use these bedeviled words the way you use me never means that I have stopped seething in anger that I have stopped swearing.