The Nonsense Museum

See a cigarette that has a filter, On each end, for help kicking the habit Rounded scissors for much faster haircuts A nose picker, (each bogie, twill grab it) There's eye-glasses with eyeballs inside A suitcase for nudists, see-through A kettle- its handle arcs over its spout A hat with a lid is on view And sometimes events are provided Like a 24-hour race for snails And a festival championing scarecrows And other queer things off the rails! See a soup plate, a plug in its bottom To drain food, when too much to digest A collection of button holes, (famous) Plus one from Napoleon's vest There's a travel case made of spaghetti A tricycle just made for twins A miniscule raft to save flies stuck in soup, Forks with mirrors for fish bones and fins There's short flight of stairs leading nowhere And keyhole-shaped glasses for spies, Crockery for the divorced, split in half Sleeping bags for when bats close their eyes Oh absurdity's needed to lighten The load of this wearisome life With businesses toppling like ninepins When a nasty wee virus is rife!