Smile Like An Idiot

Formerly lonely on summer streets swaying with happy souls making their way to movie theaters and college bars, I decided not to think about it, not regret my ghost-like existence in the haunted universe. I once left parties early to retreat to a back stairway with a book of poetry, completely superior in my mind to be with Li Po or Tu Fu but now I'd rather stay all night watching the girl in the yellow dress shimmy with her champagne glass. There were days when I could argue any point in any number of ways, almost intoxicated to hear my voice; but now I'd rather make my choice not to oppose anything but only embrace humanity and whatever lovely face happens to be in front of me. I know I'm going to spend a long time in the grave, that there's nothing I can save, no worthy example to give in the way I behave, except, to enjoy every sacred and mundane hour of joy and suffering, to simply smile like an idiot to be here! !