The Australian Slanguage

"Tis the everyday Australian Has a language of his own, Has a language, or a slanguage, Which can simply stand alone. And a "dickon pitch to kid us" Is a synonym for "lie", And to "nark it" means to stop it, And to "nit it" means to fly. And a bosom friend's a "cobber," And a horse a "prad" or "moke," While a casual acquaintance Is a "joker" or a "bloke." And his lady-love's his "donah" or his "clinah" or his "tart" Or his "little bit o' muslin," As it used to be his "bart." And his naming of the coinage Is a mystery to some, With his "quid" and "half-a-caser" And his "deener" and his "scrum". And a "tin-back" is a party Who's remarkable for luck, And his food is called his "tucker" Or his "panem" or his "chuck". A policeman is a "johnny" Or a "copman" or a "trap", And a thing obtained on credit Is invariably "strap". A conviction"s known as "trouble", And a gaol is called a "jug", And a sharper is a "spieler" And a simpleton's a "tug". If he hits a man in fighting That is what he calls a "plug", If he borrows money from you He will say he "bit your lug." And to "shake it" is to steal it, And to "strike it" is to beg; And a jest is "poking borac", And a jester "pulls your leg". Things are "cronk" when they go wrongly In the language of the "push", But when things go as he wants 'em He declares it is "all cush". When he's bright he's got a "napper", And he's "ratty" when he's daft, And when looking for employment He is "out o' blooming graft". And his clothes he calls his "clobber" Or his "togs", but what of that When a "castor" or a "kady" Is the name he gives his hat! And our undiluted English Is a fad to which we cling, But the great Australian slanguage Is a truly awful thing!