A Postcard From England

They do very nice trees in England. I can recommend the yews As places to moulder under, To distil the Eternal Dews. Their rivers are nothing special A bit too bland for me But England's a cautious country, Milk first, before the tea. I'd award four stars for history — There's a wonderful sense of rot; And tomorrow's Tesco garage Is yesterday's Norman plot. Nobody loses their temper. It's 'Please' and 'After you' (And that's just the backyard moggies Here, even the seagulls queue) They've given us Morris dancing, Roast beef and the bowler hat, And they never complain when it starts to rain And what's more British than that!